Irrational

Loving you is akin to trying to find the last digit of pi. Irrational. Loving you is like touching my hand to the burner and wondering why it hurts. Tho I swore last time the nerve endings have sizzled and there’s only the numbed sensation of maybe once more won’t. Then I have to wonder... Continue Reading →

Soooo, things I want to remember, let’s see: Defy on Friday, girls date with my Livie Lou Who to Slice of Cake, Michaels, and this super cute new gift store on Saturday, Sky Tavern Sunday, Roller Skating Monday, Costco, catching up on cleaning, and boys shooting BBs today. It’s been a good time. Liv and... Continue Reading →

Home

Home is a word with a heavy connotation. If it were just a place, it'd be easier to describe. Ever since moving out here, home hasn't felt quite right. It's just heavy. We said so many goodbyes, and with a pandemic combined with social anxiety and plain old anxiety creating a near agoraphobic state (deep... Continue Reading →

This lil light o’ mine

I let a little darkness drip from my fingers And suddenly — I felt less gray I let a little darkness drip from my fingers Because my clouds did part just right today I let a little darkness drip from my fingers in hopes the depression just stays at bay Cause I had a little... Continue Reading →

Requiem

The fire you lit in me Grows colder in your absence I swear I’m better off now, but there’s that part in me that feels suffocated in silence. Your silence. Your is an empty pronoun that could easily be their, because half the time I don’t know who you are except that you’re gone and... Continue Reading →

Diary of a Lovesong

I fell in love with a man who broke my brain and my heart. It's been years since and I still wonder about it. There's a part of me that believes there's some future where he and I will be we again. There's another part that thinks that part is the crazy part. Where is... Continue Reading →

Brain Dump babbling

I've been having these stomach aches lately - can't tell if it's anxiety or what, but I just have this overwhelming sense of doom. I'm not sure what's behind it, but it's dread and doom. Like bad shit is coming. Sometimes, I seem to have strong inklings of things and other times, I'm being led... Continue Reading →

Brain dump babble

Okay, I have about 30 minutes to write before I have to jet off to appointments and whatnot. This is the first time I've been alone in awhile. I don't have much in the way of profundity, but I had an awesome morning in the car with the kids. They were blasting Shinedown and we... Continue Reading →

Possessed Noun

I’m feeling less like a pronoun and more like a possessed noun. Though my name has two syllables, I find the constant is less my consonants and vowels and more apostrophe s’s. ‘S Mom/wife/daughter whatever. These hats that I wear so much I forget how to take them off. I know it’s a bad day... Continue Reading →

Wagging the Black Dog

Did you know shaking your body quickly and intensely - kind of like a dog shakes - is a quick way to reset your system and lessen anxiety? I learned it from one of my doctors, and it actually works really well. I just get so anxious I forget how to deal with anxiety. I... Continue Reading →

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